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An Escape From Reality Ch 5: Anna's Bad DayIt's been 3 years since our parents passed. I still can't believe it's already been that long since they died in a car accident that left five others dead and dozens injured. Soon afterwards, Elsa threw herself at her part-time job as an assistant art teacher at the local elementary school, and left me alone. I know she didn't mean to and it was just her way of dealing with their death but she became ... distant and serious all the time. She rarely smiled any more and refused to talk to me most of the time. About a year and a half ago, I found video games and about a year ago, I discovered Massive Multiplayer Online games or MMOs. Every day after school, I'd run to my room and spend the rest of my day into the wee hours of the morning in those games, only coming out for dinner. I often stayed up til 3 or 4 in the morning and then took a shower and got ready for school. I didn't get much sleep, even before video games. I played Elder Tales, explored Tyria, the world of Guild Wars
An Escape from Reality Ch 4: Game ChangerAs our vision cleared, we were in the plaza of the Town of Beginnings. We could see the green lights from other players teleporting in.
"A forced teleport?" Sinon asked.
"I didn't even know that was possible," Kirito replied.
"It's probably just the GM getting everyone together to explain the situation," Klein stated.
"GM?" I asked, feeling slightly confused.
"Game Master, " Kirito answered, quickly cutting Klein off, " the person who handles the server from the inside. A leader of sorts."
Suddenly the bell stopped as the last of the green lights disappeared. The murmuring of the confused players grew louder.
Somebody suddenly shouted, "Look, up there. What is that?"
There was a red hexagon flashing in the middle of the sky and quickly filled it, alternating System Announcement and Warning. Some viscous liquid starting seeping through the cracks between hexagons, pooling in midair. I was slightly disturbed by its appearance similar to blood and judging from my friends' expressions, the
An Escape from Reality Ch 3: New FriendsKirito looked back at the group he managed to pick up without even trying. Sinon was a beta tester. He remembered her as one of the few bow users he remembered seeing in the beta. Fuyuko on the other hand ... there was something familiar about her even though it was obvious she was not a beta tester. He couldn't quite put his finger on what was so familiar about her, but he wasn't too worried about it. And then there was Klein, the red-haired swordsman. He was loud and boisterous.
Eventually, we stopped in the middle of the field. A boar spawned in a flash of polygons.
"Klein, you first."
Klein took up a ready stance and charged the boar, though it quickly sent him flying away with a well-placed headbutt. He writhed on the ground for a few minutes. Sinon laughed at his antics while Kirito just shook his head.
"Oh come on, seriously? You can't feel any pain." At his words, Klein blinked and stopped writhing.
"Oh yeah, you're right." He stood up gingerly, as if anticipating m
An Escape from Reality Ch 2: First StepsAfter a short calibration sequence, I came to the avatar customization screen. I was momentarily stunned by the wide variety of options available. I manipulated my avatar so that it was slightly taller than my actual size, though only by a few inches. I kept the hair color the same platinum blonde as my own, though I changed the hair style slightly so that it was longer and changed my eye color to a piercing blue. I was ready to go, as soon as I decided upon the name of my character. Fuyuko was something I've used before so I swiftly typed that in, and entered the rest of the game. I was greeted by the welcome screen and swiftly tumbled through streaks of blue light and electricity.
After opening my eyes, I found myself in a town. A little pop-up stated that this was the Town of Beginnings. I started twirling around, trying to take it all in. I had to admit, it was stunning. Even though I knew it was just a game, it seemed so real. I was starting to see why Anna loved these games. I st
An Escape from Reality Ch 1: Link StartIt's been 3 years since our parents passed. I still can't believe it's already been that long since they died in a car accident that left five others dead and dozens injured. Soon afterwards, I threw myself at my part-time job as an assistant art teacher at the local elementary school. In the process, I pushed my sister, Anna, away when she needed me the most. She became ... distant and serious all the time. She rarely smiled any more and refused to talk to me most of the time. Then, about a year ago, Anna discovered Massive Multiplayer Online games or MMOs. Ever since, I rarely see my sister. Every day after school, she'd run to her room and spend the rest of her day into the wee hours of the morning in those games, only coming out for dinner. I don't know how she did it, staying up til 3 or 4 in the morning just to get up at 6:30 for school. I went to bed at 10 and still woke up tired as ever. Earlier today (my first day off in almost 6 months I might add), there was a package for An
AbandonedOne by one
people abandon me.
Just the way it's always been.
Never a reason for them to stay.
I don't ask for much
Just a life less frightening
But I guess it's too much for them
Will there ever be a time
I'm not alone?
I don't know.
But I'm still waiting
No More PainThe last time
I told a girl
that I liked her,
I jumped the gun.
I fucked up.
I got burned.
This pain is killing me.
Little by little.
The self hatred grows stronger.
I refuse to be burned again.
So no more love, no more pain.
A wall to keep everyone away.
No more light to show
every single one
of my fuck ups,
So left up your glass
filled with tonic rocks and gin
and drink the pain away.
Load up the gun
and put it to your head.
Seems to be the only way.
Broken Trust (Just Run)Face down
on ground once again.
I was shattered.
Shattered by the ones
I thought I loved.
The one I thought
loved me back.
Blood stains the ground.
Split by your hand.
The trust I had ,
the respect I had,
broken like glass
that I now have to wade through.
Just walk away.
end this hell
you've put me through.
Leave me to try
to rebuild a broken life.
A Crisis of IdentityMy voice in the shadows
My heart on the alter
A calculated risk
A walk into the flame.
Help me drive the dagger deeper
Trace with me explicit lines
To draw this darkness out like poison
My image scarred by self-infliction
Once again decline
A life rejected
The unloved staring into the abyss
Stay or go
A matter of life and death.
Kindle the fire
and take this blade
Just another test of faith,
Strike me deep and true
I put all my trust in you
End this crisis of identity
Please take it all away.
Hear my cry,
And in your strength
I will live and die
both unto you.
the truth about growing up
1. It's easier when you don't think.
1. It starts early,
on a cloudy day when you recall
the 'childhood memories' of
two summers ago,
that's when you start your backslide into
2. On the bright side
you won't notice this until you're
good and ripe in age,
so maybe it doesn't matter
3. That tightness in your chest?
The feeling that you're not ready
to take on the rest of your life; it
4. It stews in the pit of your stomach
makes you doubt,
but there will be days when you look back
on the mountains you climbed -
the raging rivers you crossed -
and you'll have a sneaking suspicion you were
more prepared than you thought.
5. There's nothing like your own bed.
6. Laundry will never smell right
without mom's sweat and tears.
But you still have to separate lights from darks,
keep the zippers pulled tight
and the buttons unhooked.
7. There is comfort in your parents' presence.
8. Things change
the future gnaws and rips
Stranger's funeralUnder the clouds
Under the rain
Staring at the coffin
At a stranger's funeral
We're all alone
Feeling the storm
But not the pain
For he's but a stranger
And the graves around us
Are just there
Keeping us company
During this empty moment
LullabyHush, my baby,
Be still, don't cry.
Lay with me
A little while.
Close your eyes,
Slow your breath.
Hear your heart
Inside your chest?
Your heart is strong,
It guides you well.
Be sure to listen
To what it tells.
I hear him now,
Outside the room.
It won't be long,
He'll find us soon.
Now close your eyes,
Slow your breath,
And rest your head
Upon my chest.
CarolineYou loved the fire
of rogues -
imperfect men who shot up
the endings of the day
and drank down
too much beauty.
And like one of them,
you bellied with rebellion,
felt his tense seed
toil where women
and craved his notoriety.
Poor girl -
his verses won the day
and the call of words
was too fickle a lover
for any constant star.
Don't blame yourself -
are more attractive
and all poets are
things to tell you before i leave for collegeto mrs hatcher:
i promise that one day i will write that poem you asked me for
(the only thing you ever asked me for)
and i will finally tell you that you deserve
so much more.
to mr. walker:
i promise that i will not pity you.
i promise that i will not envy you.
i promise that you will always be part of my forget-me-nots and marigolds.
i promise to always be grateful.
i promise to be careful.
i promise to be crazy.
i promise that i will remember what it feels like to be needed
and what it feels like to let someone who needs you down.
i promise that i will never resent you for asking for help
and that i will always be there when you do.
i promise that even sixty years from now,
i will not be surprised to find a letter from you in my mailbox.
i promise to always remember what it felt like to be young and crazy with you,
how scared and lonely we were.
i will remember that we both survived it,
and that we'll survive this, too.
To the Boy Who Likes PoetryHe was a maze of metaphors
but she didn't mind
getting lost in him
raising a warrior never was an easy jobi.
when i was a child i would
sit on the porch in the rocking chair and watch
the sky fall and the ground flood -
safe on my wooden throne, i'd call out
amid the thunder that
it would never pull me to the sky, away from
the home i'd always known; when the storm
would cease i'd stand triumphant
over fallen soldiers, lying
like stained glass and shimmering, rippling --
when i was older
i stood in kitchen and watched you
bake, fingers drumming to the beat of a
war-drum you never could hear -
and you'd tell me stories of sleeping beauties
while i read about the knights
who risked their lives, got angry at the girl --
you taught me how to be
a lioness when you realized this girl would
never be a queen. i was made to rule, but not in
robes, made to claw my way
out instead of sit and watch the fight -
my throat ached to sing
a shout of victory, my skin itched to dance
in a triumphant haze as charcoal painted
the night alive --
and now when thunder shakes
the ground i count its be
i made the universe in a teapoti made the universe in a teapot.
galaxies frothed into the mug,
stars bubbling up through the sepia beauty.
nothing was left outside, everything at the bronze brim,
the sun's edge in ceramics.
i drank the quickcopper gracefully.
my mind was a biscuit,
the milk as time,
lacing throughout the boiling hot space in that second
of pouring creation.
(alpha and omega at once as steam.)
Welcome to Your NightmareWelcome to your nightmare.
This is the price of evil.
The sins that you've commited
and the darkness in your soul
have brought you here.
God ain't on your side anymore.
Your relationship with him was severed
when you rejected his commandments.
Nothing will stop the madness.
Your crimes haunt you.
But the trigger won't save you.
So now they ink numbers in your soul.
Just a puppet in the devil's show.
Just a slave in the hellfire.
This is the place where
Right is wrong
And wrong is right.
Pain needs no reason here.
This is your fate.
Such a tragic
turn of events.
No way out.
This is where you belong.
I'm your fucking nightmare.
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